Beowulf and Godsylla

Beowulf ond Godsylla

Meanehwæl, baccat meaddehæle, monstær lurccen;
Fulle few too many drincce, hie luccen for fyht.
Ðen Hreorfneorhtðhwr, son of Hrwærowþheororthwl,
Æsccen æwful jeork to steop outsyd. Þhud! Bashe! Crasch! Beoom! Ðe bigge gye
Eallum his bon brak, byt his nose offe;
Wicced Godsylla wæld on his asse.
Monstær moppe fleor wyþ eallum men in hælle.
Beowulf in bacceroome fonecall bamaccen wæs;
Hearen sond of ruccus sæd, "Hwæt ðe helle?"
Graben sheold strang ond swich-blæd scharp
Stond feorth to fyht ðe grimlic foe. "Me," Godsylla sæd, "mac ðe minsemete."
Heoro cwyc geten heold wiþ fæmed half-nelson
Ond flyng him lic frisbe bac to fen
Beowulf belly up to meaddehæle bar,
Sæd, "Ne foe beaten mie færsom cung-fu."
Eorderen cocca-cohla yce-coeld, ðe reol þyng.

Translation:
 Meanwhile, back at the mead-hall, the monster lurked
Full few too many drinks, he was looking for a fight
Then Hreorfneorhtðhwr, son of Hreorfneorhtðhwr asked the awful jerk to step outside
Thud, Bash, Crash, boom, the big guy
All of his bones broke, bit his nose off;
Wicked Godzilla wailed on his ass
Monster mopped the floor with all the men in the hall
Beowulf in the backroom making a phone call
Hearing sounds of ruckus said, "What the hell?"
Grabbed his strong shield and sharp switch blade
Stood forth to fight the grimlic foe
"Me," Godzilla said, "Make the mince-meat"
Hero ? quickly got (getting) held with the famed half-nelson
And flying him like a frisbee back and forth
Beowulf belly up to the mead-hall's bar,
said, "No foe has beaten my fearsome kung-fu."
He ordered coca-cola, ice cold, the real thing